Good morning from the plane home from San Francisco. I’ll have some fun Palm Springs and SF pieces this week and two new podcasts with Sharon McMahon and Elise Hu.
In case you missed it we had a great episode last week with a former trad wife who explains just how hard it is to escape a marriage when you have no money and no work history. Her husband was so controlling that he wouldn’t get her a kindle because he didn’t want her to have so many options of what to read. It’s a good listen.
I’ve been getting a lot of messages over the past few days asking about my opinion on the RFK/Olivia Nuzzi story.
Quick primer on this new scandal if you are one of my many friends who have checked out of the news cycle for your personal well-being.
Last week New York magazine put their top Washington correspondent Olivia Nuzzi on leave after finding out she allegedly had a thing with former presidential candidateRobert F. Kennedy Jr.
The thing apparently wasn’t physical, but it did last for nearly a year and involved the texting of what has been described as “tasteful” nude photos by Nuzzi.
This Slate explainer is great if you want more.
Also RFK, 70, is still married to the actress Cheryl Hines from Curb Your Enthusiasm (a fact that everyone I know is confounded by) and Nuzzi, 31, was until recently engaged.
I want to preface this by saying that in my long career as a journalist I have been hit on and flirted with by an inappropriate number of men (celebrities and politicos) who were my potential sources. I won’t name names ever because I’m not a massive asshat, but it happened a bunch and I always politely shut it down. I have also been inappropriately sexted and asked for dirty pictures. The fact that this is true is gross for so many reasons, but I want to make it clear that this is a thing that regularly happens to a lot of female journalists and has been happening to us forever.
As I was writing this we were hanging by a fire pit last night when a friend’s teenage daughters came out and told us they were heading out for a bonfire.
“Have fun,” I yelled. “Your body your choice! Make good decisions!”
I was thinking about all of this advice as I tried to figure out what to write about this situation. First of all, women are the bosses of their bodies. What they do is their choice whether that is consenting to something or choosing to engage in something that brings them pleasure. I would never judge a woman for any of that.
But it is fair to judge a journalist for decisions that put their outlet at risk, and that is where the second bit of advice comes in….make good decisions. No one involved in this situation was making good decisions. All of these grownups behaved extremely poorly and in a manner that was entirely thoughtless about how their actions would impact others.
Everyone here was sort of a dumb ass. I’m not gonna mince words about that. Journalists have a very basic code of ethics. Our jobs often come with little training when we get started and yet the one thing that is drilled into us in any newsroom is don’t get too close to a source.
It’s so simple! Don’t fuck a source! Don’t text nude photos or sext with a source. Just say no if asked.
Was RFK a jackass for bragging all over the place about receiving nude photos of Olivia Nuzzi, of boasting so much that her bosses found out?
Yes! Yet another bad decision.
I’m always amazed when professional successful adults end up having the executive functioning and decision making capabilities of horny and high teenagers, but maybe I shouldn’t be.
The latest is that RFK apparently wants to sue Nuzzi for bombarding him with nude photos, which seems like a massive pile of bullshit.
Everyone in this situation made bad decisions. In a world where media is intensely scrutinized and called out for bias, in a political landscape where most reasonable people just don’t want to see democracy end, this is a terrible look.
So those are my thoughts. Both RFK and Nuzzi have important jobs to do and both put those at risk for what seems like some weird raunchy sexting.
NY Mag is apparently making a review of all of Nuzzi’s work, but even if they let her go she will be fine. She’ll likely get a big ass book deal and then start her own digital platform because that’s the way infamy works these days. RFK won’t suffer either because once you’ve admitted you killed a baby bear and then dropped its body off in Central Park no one is really shocked by how suss you are any more.
Imo it’s not just sexting a source, it’s that she was reporting on Biden and Trump while sexting another Presidential candidate! Like, how objectively is she writing about them while sexting RFK Jr?
Can’t believe how “blindsided” Jessica Kraus was by this.